Coaching in Banyoles
This last month of September I celebrated that I have been coaching teenagers and parents for 3 years.
Many Spaniards still associate coaching to the business environment but coaching teenagers and parents is a reality.
Coaching young people and their parents gives the possibility to help young people during their adolescence, a period in our live that it is specially important and often, specially complicated.
When I see a young girl or boy, thinking, quietly, dreaming…. I ask myself: “What must he or she be thinking?” and “what this teenager is thinking, does it help take his or her decisions?” Or “are they caught in a dead end?” “Is that person happy with herself?”
One of the inputs that coaching brings to teenagers and their families is to learn to believe in young people. As parents we need to believe that they will be ok and they will develop enough self-confidence to take the best decisions for their future.
If, as parents, we doubt about this belief, teenagers will feel it, they sense it and this goes against our interests. Our role is to accompany them, without forcing in our preferences and experiences. Young people need to learn by themselves, instead of taking the decisions that they perceive adults expect from them. It is not easy but it is possible and the first step is to be aware of this.
When I talk to my son or my daughter, am I showing that I really believe in him/her? Or, on the contrary do I doubt without realizing it?
Let’s be careful. The words that we use have a big influence on the person we talk to. If nobody helps us realize how we talk to teenagers, our words could be creating the opposite effect that we are looking for. Why do we choose a word and not another one?
This small change in perspective, when we start believing and showing this belief towards ours children, is a huge step to accompany them and help them to mature and gain confidence.
Giving young people the opportunity to believe in them, without conditions, without “yes, but….”, allows them to start behaving without the need to “defend” themselves. This small change can be the beginning of a new time in the family relations. It is worth to make the effort and change the strategy because, for most of us, to be mother or father is the most important job in our lives.
I do coaching with teenagers and parents in Banyoles and in Girona (Acadèmia Octàgon)